The much-feared black sarcophagus recently opened in Egypt may not have released any curses (that we noticed, at least) – but it certainly seems to have awakened strange desires in some people.

It would seem the story of the mysterious black sarcophagus has had its happy ending: all of the historic discovery with none of the bad mojo. But no, the weirdness is not over just yet. Now, over 5,300 people say they want to drink of the murky liquid that was discovered in the sarcophagus along with ancient bones.

Someone launched a petition on to “let people drink the red liquid from the dark sarcophagus.” The author, who goes under the name of “innes mck,” believes the “skeleton juice” (eww) should be made into “some sort of carbonated energy drink,” so anyone wishing to drink it “can assume its powers and finally die.”

The idea, as gross as it is, appealed to thousands of people who signed the petition. A perplexing look at the comments section for answers as to why anyone would want to drink sewage mixed with human decomposition products reveals that some are just thirsty. Others are in it for the taste or the sheer expression of free will.

Others delivered the written equivalent of a chanted prayer to some dark gods or descended into downright Lovecraftian Cthulhu-speak.

While the whole thing is obviously a joke (please let it be a joke), we really hope the King of Skeletons (who the petition is addressed to) doesn’t have Internet access in whatever ominous crypt he resides, just in case he decides to fulfill the petitioners’ request. Who knows what might happen.